Chuck Norris never states his intentions, he states his demands.
Chuck Norris is the only person ever to land on runway 37.
Hijackers squawk 7500 when Chuck Norris is on board.
When Chuck Norris flies, the altimeter setting is 00.00. Chuck Norris is never under pressure.
Chuck Norris once moved a stationary front.
When Chuck Norris taxis onto the runway, incoming traffic is told to hold short.
Chuck Norris never “loses” altitude, he simply gets rid of it when he no longer has any use for it.
Chuck Norris was once denied a clearance…once!
Chuck Norris has never landed with a crosswind. The wind would never dare get cross with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris isn’t holding, he is circling above his victims.
When told to break at the numbers, Chuck Norris politely reminded the controller that Chuck Norris cannot be broken and proceeded with the straight in.
Chuck Norris doesn’t shoot approaches…he kills them.
Chuck Norris is never off of glideslope, the glideslope is off of Chuck Norris
Chuck Norris doesn’t need crew rest…he never sleeps.
Chuck Norris is never given the instructions “when able”. Chuck Norris is never unable to do anything.
Favorable winds are always in the same direction as Chuck Norris’ flight path.
A permanent TFR surrounds Chuck Norris…no one is safe.
Right of Way rules do not apply when Chuck Norris is flying. If you are flying toward Chuck Norris, you are wrong.
Crew Scheduling sits reserve for Chuck Norris.